In making more of an effort to keep updated on this blog, I have spent the last couple of days going through different topics that I should write about.
I instantly remembered reading conversations on the parent groups about this mysterious word that KS kiddos (and let’s be real, all kiddos) seem to melt down about. That pesky two letter word NO. And wouldn’t you believe, we have the same problem in our house!
We noticed it started to get worse at around his 3rd birthday. Which is also fitting because we didn’t have the traditional terrible 2s that most warn you about. Nope, we had the I may murder my child 3’s :D. However, the one parenting thing I can confidently say that my husband and I have on lock is maneuvering the word NO and also calming the tantrums to under 5 minutes without yelling or losing our cool.
So what do we do? Options.
This parenting tool originally was something I had “come up with” off the top of my head, but after a recent discovery – there are a lot of parenting books that use this method as well! WINNING!
So how do we use options instead of no? Well, if Cheekies is wanting something or is throwing a fit about something, we will give him two options to choose from that are parent approved in the direction we want him to go.
EXAMPLE: Halloween just happened and obviously Cheekies wants candy for breakfast dinner and lunch.. the candy is also a common tantrum we have faced the last month. 9 times out of 10 he wants candy BEFORE dinner.
Instead of telling him “NO. You don’t need candy.” I will first start by telling him that he needs to eat his dinner first and then he can have a piece of candy. I have already predicted that he will throw a fit, but trying to tell him he needs to eat before treats is something I find important because he will sometimes listen. (hooray on those days) But alas we normally get a small tantrum.
My next step is to crouch down on his level and give him his options: “Here’s the deal, we can either eat our dinner and get a piece of candy, or we can not eat our dinner and get zero pieces of candy. What would you like to do?” This gives him the control toddlers are subconsciously battling with as they mature, but it also allows them to do what you need them to do without telling them NO.
We have done this at home, in stores, at disneyland, and school, anywhere we need to. It works for us immensely and will probably be something we practice for a while. We have been able to get his tantrums calmed within 2 minutes of it starting which I find to be a success. And if the tantrum does turn into a mini meltdown, we go into our meltdown parenting style which I will go into on a different post, but its mainly giving them chill time and redirecting.
Anyways, I hope this helps for some of you. I believe this tool is probably best used the younger they are – not sure how it will work with older kiddos. And AGAIN, this is what we do and what works for us.
Share in the comments below what your experience with the word NO and how you overcome these battles 😀
We are coming up on Mr. Cheek’s second testosterone shot this week and I figured I would give an update on his progress and talk a little more about our journey with Klinefelter Syndrome.
First – I want to talk about his visit with his pediatrician…
We had to take Cheeks to his Dr. A couple of weeks ago and I was disappointed to find out that the specialist had not informed him of his new diagnosis. Do Dr.’s not talk to each other anymore? Really irked me…On the plus side – his pediatrician (whom I love) was actually very familiar with Klinefelters Syndrome! The first thing be said after B told him was, “We are going to have a tall one on our hands!”
He has never had a patient with it before, but he has worked with many patients with other chromosome syndromes and has many patients now with autism. It was nice to know we have someone in our corner on this new journey with us. He said that as of right now his development and motor functions are very advanced for his age (yes!) but he knows as well as we do that that could change in the months to come. We are all on the same page right now as far as watching for signs of autism and that’s all I can ask for. It gave me a sense of relief knowing A. The Dr. truly cares about Aiden (we have known that since his personal call on Christmas when he called to tell us, “I have been thinking.. And I thought about what I would do if this is my son… And id like for Aiden to see a specialist.”) and B. He knows about ks (from what I have read many drs don’t know much). So this is really great for us!
On to the testosterone shot:
– First and foremost there were no side effects that we saw with the first shot. If anything he was much happier and energetic! Which is never a bad thing.
– Within the first week we noticed a significant different in his willie! Before we couldn’t see it at all and now it’s poppin right out!
– I think the biggest change we have seen is in his muscle strength. He was able to lift himself much easier after his shot and has definitely been able to move quite easier.
– As far as his mental development he has been doing pretty good. He has found his screaming voice and has decided to scream and yell at anyone in his sight… Which was really funny at the mall this weekend. Brandon and I have been working really hard object training with him. Anytime he touches something we make sure to repeat the objects name.. Which seems to be working. I plan on starting sign language with him which I hope will help.
He has still been doing his stimulators wrist and ankle rolls.. Which I have been keeping an eye on.
That’s pretty much it on the update. We go into the specialist next week to have his second shot and I will update before his 3rd of this first series.
Also – if you missed my update on the first post about this.. These were the two sites that have me the most valuable info on Klinefelters Syndrom
http://www.openingautism.com/Genetics/ConditionDetails/26
Genetics.org
Written with my iPhone… Sometimes my fingers are drunk… Often my phone can’t translate
Mamma Bluette 